BOOM.

I don't remember the last time I wanted something this bad.

It feels so right.

I can only hope.

Sometimes I just need a good cry.

It can come out of nowhere.

The end of my freshman year, I decided I wanted to take photography. I went to my guidance counselor to give her the classes I had decided on for next year.

She typed it into the computer and realized that photography could not fit.

It started with a few tears, and before I knew it I was balling.

My breathing became short and tense, and the tears, good Lord, I could not stop the tears. I was in her office for a whole period, just overwhelmed. I mean it didn't help that her eyes were trying to pierce into my soul.

I really had no legitimate reason to cry, but once I started I couldn't stop.

That happened again today. I'm afraid I scared a bank teller, Peggy, with them, but honestly she gave me the most skeptical look as I approached her- like I was a child in an adult's world. Honey, I am 18, please do not underestimate me.

Back to the story- the tears started and then they also couldn't stop again. I was in such a public place, I wanted them to stop, willed them to stop.

I avoided eye contact with everyone.

I avoided contact.

It was easier.